1 00:00:01,435 --> 00:00:04,605 [ Ted Narrating ] Kids, this is a story of landmarks. 2 00:00:04,672 --> 00:00:06,707 There are certain moments in life when you have to decide... 3 00:00:06,774 --> 00:00:08,742 which things you can stand to see torn down... 4 00:00:08,809 --> 00:00:11,679 and which things you have to preserve, no matter what. 5 00:00:11,745 --> 00:00:14,782 Such a moment came for us all in May of 2011... 6 00:00:14,848 --> 00:00:18,719 at a special meeting of the New York City Landmarks Preservation Commission, 7 00:00:18,786 --> 00:00:21,989 where the fate of the Arcadian would be decided once and for all. 8 00:00:22,056 --> 00:00:25,226 "A symbol of strength and constancy, 9 00:00:25,293 --> 00:00:29,697 the stone lion of the Arcadian has watched over New Yorkers for generations. 10 00:00:29,763 --> 00:00:34,235 So remember, if the lion head stonework is regal, 11 00:00:34,302 --> 00:00:38,239 then tearing it down should be illegal." 12 00:00:39,107 --> 00:00:41,275 Well? Do you like that? 13 00:00:41,342 --> 00:00:45,379 All right. "We must make sure the lion is always there. 14 00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:49,783 Destroy the Arcadian? Oh, no, don't you dare." 15 00:00:53,421 --> 00:00:56,357 Yeah? Yeah, okay. Try this one on for size. 16 00:00:56,424 --> 00:00:59,793 "If you want New York's history at your beck and call"-- 17 00:00:59,860 --> 00:01:02,830 - All right, thank you, Mr. Eriksen. - I just-- Yeah. 18 00:01:04,132 --> 00:01:06,600 [ Cheering ] 19 00:01:06,667 --> 00:01:10,704 We will now hear from the architect of the proposed GNB Tower, 20 00:01:10,771 --> 00:01:13,107 Mr. Ted Mosby. 21 00:01:14,908 --> 00:01:18,679 Now, uh, Mr. Mosby, let's cut right to the chase. 22 00:01:18,746 --> 00:01:21,415 Do you think the Arcadian should be a landmark? 23 00:01:31,659 --> 00:01:34,795 Okay, it's killing me. What rhymes with "beck and call"? 24 00:01:34,862 --> 00:01:36,430 [ Audience Laughing ] 25 00:01:36,497 --> 00:01:39,667 Wrecking ball. Don't go swingin' no wrecking ball. 26 00:01:39,733 --> 00:01:42,170 [ Audience ] Ah! 27 00:01:42,236 --> 00:01:43,971 Thank you. 28 00:01:44,037 --> 00:01:46,507 ** [ Upbeat Pop ] 29 00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:49,843 ** [ Man Vocalizing ] 30 00:01:54,815 --> 00:01:56,317 ** [ Ends ] 31 00:01:57,685 --> 00:02:01,255 Mr. Mosby, do you think the Arcadian should be a landmark? 32 00:02:01,322 --> 00:02:03,291 It's not a difficult question. 33 00:02:03,357 --> 00:02:05,426 [ Ted Narrating ] It was a difficult question. 34 00:02:05,493 --> 00:02:09,597 Of course, had he asked me a few days earlier, I would have immediately said-- 35 00:02:09,663 --> 00:02:13,467 Yes. The Arcadian should be a landmark. And then the crowd gasps. 36 00:02:13,534 --> 00:02:15,969 [ Southern Accent ] "Oh, my God. Did he really just say that? 37 00:02:16,036 --> 00:02:20,474 Oh, heavens. Oh, my stars. I must clutch my pearls." 38 00:02:20,541 --> 00:02:23,611 So these things are generally attended by old southern ladies? 39 00:02:23,677 --> 00:02:25,746 Almost exclusively. But here's my point. 40 00:02:25,813 --> 00:02:29,450 If they ask GNB's chief architect, a.k.a. me, 41 00:02:29,517 --> 00:02:32,686 if the Arcadian should be a landmark and I say yes-- 42 00:02:32,753 --> 00:02:34,388 [ Imitates Explosion ] 43 00:02:35,623 --> 00:02:37,758 No, that wasn't the Arcadian being destroyed. 44 00:02:37,825 --> 00:02:39,860 That was GNB's hopes of destroying the Arcadian. 45 00:02:39,927 --> 00:02:41,995 I'm sorry. I should have been more clear. [ Zoey ] Yeah. 46 00:02:42,062 --> 00:02:43,897 The Arcadian's gonna be all like-- 47 00:02:44,865 --> 00:02:46,567 Nice. [ Laughs ] 48 00:02:46,634 --> 00:02:48,436 I have a message from Barney. 49 00:02:48,502 --> 00:02:50,871 [ Ted Narrating ] Things between Barney and the rest of us... 50 00:02:50,938 --> 00:02:53,073 had gotten a little frosty. 51 00:02:53,140 --> 00:02:54,608 Hey, guys. First this happened. 52 00:02:54,675 --> 00:02:57,778 Meet the new lawyer I hired to help save the Arcadian. 53 00:02:59,247 --> 00:03:00,814 And then this happened. 54 00:03:00,881 --> 00:03:04,552 What kind of dirtbag doesn't stand by his best friends, 55 00:03:04,618 --> 00:03:07,788 but instead sides with some self-righteous bitch... 56 00:03:07,855 --> 00:03:10,123 with a pointless cause and a megaphone? 57 00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,626 Dude, that's my girlfriend. 58 00:03:12,693 --> 00:03:14,295 And you know what? 59 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,130 I'm on her side now too. 60 00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:18,832 Which led to this happening. 61 00:03:18,899 --> 00:03:22,270 Message from Barney-- that's my cue to leave. Good night, guys. 62 00:03:22,336 --> 00:03:24,538 I love you. Mmm. Love you too. 63 00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:25,906 Bye. 64 00:03:25,973 --> 00:03:28,376 What's the message? 'Cause if it's another hypothetical, 65 00:03:28,442 --> 00:03:30,978 yet eerily accurate drawing of my boobs-- 66 00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:32,946 Yeah, I have that too. 67 00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:36,750 Damn it. 68 00:03:36,817 --> 00:03:40,254 All right, here's the message. [ Clears Throat ] 69 00:03:40,321 --> 00:03:42,189 "Oh, hey, guys. Didn't see you there. 70 00:03:42,256 --> 00:03:44,658 I was too busy feeling fine and"-- 71 00:03:45,626 --> 00:03:46,527 Really? 72 00:03:50,264 --> 00:03:52,933 [ Sighs ] "Feeling fine and gettin' some gine. 73 00:03:54,402 --> 00:03:58,105 You may have noticed the giant plate of hot wings in front of me. 74 00:03:58,171 --> 00:04:00,374 I know how much you love hot wings. 75 00:04:00,441 --> 00:04:03,977 Too bad someone bribed the kitchen to take them off the menu tonight. 76 00:04:04,044 --> 00:04:08,682 So if you want some, you're gonna have to come back to GNB. 77 00:04:08,749 --> 00:04:12,453 But hurry. This offer will be gone lickety-split. 78 00:04:17,491 --> 00:04:18,992 Do evil laugh." 79 00:04:19,059 --> 00:04:20,428 Oh. Um-- 80 00:04:20,494 --> 00:04:22,996 - Ba-ha, ah-ha! - [ Mouths Words ] 81 00:04:24,732 --> 00:04:26,400 So, what are you turds up to? 82 00:04:26,467 --> 00:04:29,202 Well, we've got the big L.P.C. meeting in two days. 83 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:30,704 I have my whole presentation worked out. 84 00:04:30,771 --> 00:04:33,140 I just need to find a good rhyme to end on. 85 00:04:33,206 --> 00:04:34,808 Why does it need to rhyme? 86 00:04:34,875 --> 00:04:37,578 If you end an argument with a rhyme, 87 00:04:37,645 --> 00:04:39,380 it's convincing all the time. 88 00:04:39,447 --> 00:04:41,382 Yeah. It's why, in our apartment, 89 00:04:41,449 --> 00:04:45,218 if you're a-hopin' to score, don't leave your socks on the floor. 90 00:04:45,285 --> 00:04:47,120 And she hasn't since. 91 00:04:47,187 --> 00:04:49,122 Okay, okay. A couple things. 92 00:04:49,189 --> 00:04:50,591 - Lily, how'd I do? - Nailed it. 93 00:04:50,658 --> 00:04:52,393 [ Chuckles ] Secondly, 94 00:04:52,460 --> 00:04:55,062 Ted, I'm sorry I said mean things about Zoey. 95 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:58,766 Are you really gonna walk away from this project just because you're mad at me? 96 00:04:58,832 --> 00:05:00,934 It's not because I'm mad at you. 97 00:05:01,001 --> 00:05:04,705 Barney, the Arcadian was designed by a guy named John Clifford Larrabee. 98 00:05:04,772 --> 00:05:06,740 And even though he's been dead for half a century, 99 00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:10,010 it's my duty, architect to architect, to keep his work alive. 100 00:05:10,077 --> 00:05:13,013 Please tell me a little part of you understands. 101 00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:15,248 I understand. 102 00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:17,718 Zoey has magic lady bits. 103 00:05:17,785 --> 00:05:21,655 - What? - Zoey's lady bits are magic. 104 00:05:21,722 --> 00:05:23,724 And that's how she controls your mind. 105 00:05:23,791 --> 00:05:26,293 You see, every few hundred millennia, 106 00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,228 lady bits leap forward. 107 00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:31,331 I know you're only just getting started, but this is already gross. 108 00:05:31,399 --> 00:05:34,435 I once knew such a girl. 109 00:05:34,502 --> 00:05:37,638 It was last call, in this very bar. 110 00:05:42,710 --> 00:05:44,177 What? 111 00:05:44,244 --> 00:05:46,514 No! 112 00:05:47,247 --> 00:05:48,616 What? 113 00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:50,984 No! 114 00:05:52,853 --> 00:05:54,254 What? 115 00:05:54,321 --> 00:05:56,557 Um-- 116 00:05:56,624 --> 00:06:00,528 Thank you for, um, not using a first name in that story. 117 00:06:02,896 --> 00:06:05,699 Barney, this is about the building. 118 00:06:05,766 --> 00:06:07,835 Come on. This is so about the girl. 119 00:06:07,901 --> 00:06:10,438 Okay, fine. It's about the girl. 120 00:06:10,504 --> 00:06:13,841 I am doing this for Zoey. I'm in love with her. 121 00:06:13,907 --> 00:06:17,377 Look, I know it's early, but there's a very good chance... 122 00:06:17,445 --> 00:06:19,547 Zoey might be the mother of my children. 123 00:06:19,613 --> 00:06:21,949 So in addition to doing this for John Clifford Larrabee, 124 00:06:22,015 --> 00:06:24,051 I'm also doing this for Luke and Leia. 125 00:06:24,117 --> 00:06:27,020 She's gonna let you name your kids Luke and Leia? 126 00:06:27,087 --> 00:06:30,558 Not if I knock down her favorite building she isn't. Barney, I'm sorry. 127 00:06:30,624 --> 00:06:34,495 Oh, you're not sorry now, Ted Mosby, but you will be. 128 00:06:34,562 --> 00:06:38,365 You... will... be. 129 00:06:38,432 --> 00:06:42,135 [ Chortling ] 130 00:06:42,202 --> 00:06:44,304 Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! 131 00:06:44,371 --> 00:06:46,273 That's how you do an evil laugh. 132 00:06:46,339 --> 00:06:47,875 Ciao for now. 133 00:06:49,209 --> 00:06:51,311 [ Ted Narrating ] Now, kids, you remember Arthur Hobbs, 134 00:06:51,378 --> 00:06:53,447 Barney and Marshall's old boss at GNB. 135 00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:56,416 Well, Arthur was going through a divorce and taking it kind of hard. 136 00:06:56,484 --> 00:06:58,486 Hi, Arthur. 137 00:06:58,552 --> 00:07:01,421 - Everything okay? - No, everything's not okay. 138 00:07:01,489 --> 00:07:04,858 My stupid wife got custody of Tugboat. 139 00:07:04,925 --> 00:07:08,228 God, I should've kept her hidden in a cage in the basement. 140 00:07:08,295 --> 00:07:10,197 Isn't that animal cruelty? 141 00:07:10,263 --> 00:07:12,099 I'm talking about my wife. 142 00:07:12,165 --> 00:07:14,434 Oh. That's fine then. 143 00:07:15,469 --> 00:07:19,372 So, listen. You know Ted, the architect? 144 00:07:19,439 --> 00:07:20,974 Yeah, I know your friend Ted. 145 00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:23,276 So if Ted stood up at that big meeting tomorrow... 146 00:07:23,343 --> 00:07:27,014 and said that he thought the Arcadian should be a landmark, 147 00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:29,216 you wouldn't just fire him, would you? 148 00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:31,852 [ Chuckling ] Right? 149 00:07:31,919 --> 00:07:34,421 You wouldn't just-- You wouldn't just-- 150 00:07:34,488 --> 00:07:36,990 No, Barney, I wouldn't just fire him. 151 00:07:37,057 --> 00:07:38,926 I'd also fire you. 152 00:07:39,827 --> 00:07:41,862 Come again for Big Fudge? 153 00:07:46,834 --> 00:07:49,970 Can you believe that? I can't be unemployed, Robin. 154 00:07:50,037 --> 00:07:52,606 My job is my identity. It's who I am. 155 00:07:52,673 --> 00:07:56,944 It gives me the confidence I need to convince girls I'm a fighter pilot. 156 00:07:57,010 --> 00:08:00,781 I-I don't understand. Why would he fire you? 157 00:08:00,848 --> 00:08:03,116 I don't understand. Why would you fire me? 158 00:08:03,183 --> 00:08:05,986 Have you already forgotten how Mosby got that job? 159 00:08:06,053 --> 00:08:08,522 By being the best architect available? 160 00:08:08,589 --> 00:08:10,190 [ Scoffs ] No. 161 00:08:10,257 --> 00:08:13,093 By... being Latino? 162 00:08:13,160 --> 00:08:14,695 No. 163 00:08:14,762 --> 00:08:18,198 Let me refresh your memory. We were in this very room. 164 00:08:18,265 --> 00:08:20,333 Guys, I'm telling you. 165 00:08:20,400 --> 00:08:24,371 If Ted Mosby isn't fantastic, fire me. 166 00:08:24,437 --> 00:08:27,474 Damn it. I was kidding? 167 00:08:27,541 --> 00:08:29,342 I'm not kidding. 168 00:08:29,409 --> 00:08:32,112 Oh, by the way, Arthur, how are things with you and your wife? 169 00:08:32,179 --> 00:08:35,315 Really good. In fact, I just put all my assets in her name. 170 00:08:35,382 --> 00:08:37,618 Smartest thing I've ever done. 171 00:08:37,685 --> 00:08:39,052 [ Together ] Damn it! 172 00:08:39,119 --> 00:08:41,789 You better make sure Mosby doesn't screw up tomorrow, 173 00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:44,057 because either that building is going down... 174 00:08:44,124 --> 00:08:46,660 or you're going down. 175 00:08:46,727 --> 00:08:48,962 They're gonna fire him? That sucks. 176 00:08:49,029 --> 00:08:52,332 He loves that job. He's been doing it for years. 177 00:08:52,399 --> 00:08:54,367 Okay, what does Barney do at GNB? 178 00:08:54,434 --> 00:08:56,536 No idea. He has a lot of keys. 179 00:08:56,604 --> 00:08:58,706 Ted, can you please just think about this before you go-- 180 00:08:58,772 --> 00:09:00,941 There's nothing to think about. I can't lose Zoey. 181 00:09:01,008 --> 00:09:02,910 That's the only thing that matters to me right now. 182 00:09:02,976 --> 00:09:05,813 Okay, Ted, you know I love Zoey. 183 00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:09,717 But look, sometimes I go play chess in the park. 184 00:09:09,783 --> 00:09:11,752 And the key to chess-- 185 00:09:11,819 --> 00:09:13,987 Okay, I play online. 186 00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:16,556 But the key to chess-- Okay, it's Angry Birds. 187 00:09:18,325 --> 00:09:23,030 But the key to Angry Birds is to always try to see every possible outcome... 188 00:09:23,096 --> 00:09:25,332 and to hit some pigs with rocks or something. 189 00:09:25,398 --> 00:09:27,701 I don't know. I don't play. I can't get it to download. 190 00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:31,438 The point is, this thing with you and Zoey, 191 00:09:31,504 --> 00:09:34,207 I can see it going three possible ways. 192 00:09:34,274 --> 00:09:37,077 There's the first scenario. The chairman asks you-- 193 00:09:37,144 --> 00:09:39,647 Do you think the Arcadian should be a landmark? 194 00:09:39,713 --> 00:09:40,681 You say-- No. 195 00:09:40,748 --> 00:09:42,182 And Zoey dumps you on the spot. 196 00:09:42,249 --> 00:09:43,851 We're done here. 197 00:09:44,785 --> 00:09:46,720 There's the second scenario. 198 00:09:46,787 --> 00:09:50,523 - The chairman asks you-- - Do you think the Arcadian should be a landmark? 199 00:09:50,590 --> 00:09:51,625 You say-- Yes. 200 00:09:51,692 --> 00:09:53,560 And you're happy for, like, a second... 201 00:09:53,627 --> 00:09:55,629 until you realize the building you helped save... 202 00:09:55,696 --> 00:09:58,598 has just become a monument to everything this woman made you give up. 203 00:09:58,666 --> 00:10:02,469 And you resent her for it-- so much so in fact that you dump her. 204 00:10:02,535 --> 00:10:04,037 We're done here. 205 00:10:04,104 --> 00:10:06,073 You said there was a third scenario. 206 00:10:06,139 --> 00:10:08,608 Right. The chairman asks you-- 207 00:10:08,676 --> 00:10:10,844 Do you think the Arcadian should be a landmark? 208 00:10:10,911 --> 00:10:13,146 But before you can answer, 209 00:10:13,213 --> 00:10:15,315 you're hit in the neck with a blow dart fired by the ninja... 210 00:10:15,382 --> 00:10:17,651 Zoey's ex-husband hired to assassinate you. 211 00:10:17,718 --> 00:10:20,087 [ Speaking Japanese ] 212 00:10:20,988 --> 00:10:22,923 That one's less likely. 213 00:10:24,692 --> 00:10:27,527 [ Sighs ] What I'm saying-- 214 00:10:27,594 --> 00:10:29,963 What I hate saying... is this. 215 00:10:31,498 --> 00:10:33,667 You and Zoey are gonna break up. 216 00:10:33,734 --> 00:10:37,070 But you can still save your career and Barney's. 217 00:10:37,137 --> 00:10:40,407 Okay, first of all, no ninja's getting a jump on me. 218 00:10:40,473 --> 00:10:43,043 I have the reflexes of a jungle-- [ Grunts ] 219 00:10:44,011 --> 00:10:45,145 Tree? 220 00:10:46,747 --> 00:10:50,183 Second of all, I don't care that the odds are stacked against us. 221 00:10:50,250 --> 00:10:52,319 I'd rather try to make this work with Zoey... 222 00:10:52,385 --> 00:10:55,255 than spend the rest of my life alone playing Angry Birds, 223 00:10:55,322 --> 00:10:57,590 which, by the way, I've shown you how to download, like, 20 times. 224 00:10:57,657 --> 00:11:00,227 I gotta say I'm with Ted on this. 225 00:11:00,293 --> 00:11:01,228 Thank you. Yes, 226 00:11:01,294 --> 00:11:04,397 this is a huge divisive issue for them, 227 00:11:04,464 --> 00:11:07,835 which means no matter what happens, there's gonna be a lot of resentment, 228 00:11:07,901 --> 00:11:10,603 probably lasting for years, 229 00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:15,342 infecting every single moment of the rest of their relationship. 230 00:11:15,408 --> 00:11:18,045 So in conclusion, I'm with Robin on this. 231 00:11:18,111 --> 00:11:19,446 Thank you. 232 00:11:20,848 --> 00:11:23,216 [ Ted Narrating ] That night, as I slept soundly-- 233 00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:29,757 [ Gasps ] 234 00:11:31,424 --> 00:11:33,326 Barney, what are you doing? 235 00:11:33,393 --> 00:11:35,595 Who is this Barney? 236 00:11:35,662 --> 00:11:39,767 My name is John Clifford Larrabee, architect of the Arcadian. 237 00:11:39,833 --> 00:11:42,135 - [ Scoffs ] - And I am visiting you... 238 00:11:42,202 --> 00:11:44,704 in a dreeeeeam. 239 00:11:44,772 --> 00:11:46,273 Really? 240 00:11:46,339 --> 00:11:48,541 'Cause it feels more like my insane friend renting a costume... 241 00:11:48,608 --> 00:11:50,778 and breaking into my apartment in the middle of the night... 242 00:11:50,844 --> 00:11:53,246 for what I wish I could say was the first time. 243 00:11:53,313 --> 00:11:56,917 It's a dream. It is. So just-- Okay? 244 00:11:58,786 --> 00:12:02,489 Theodore, heed my words. 245 00:12:02,555 --> 00:12:05,793 Do not try to save the Arcadian. 246 00:12:05,859 --> 00:12:08,461 Barney, there's condoms in the drawer. Just take 'em and get out. 247 00:12:08,528 --> 00:12:11,865 I am not Barney! 248 00:12:11,932 --> 00:12:15,035 Whoa! Lighting change! 249 00:12:15,102 --> 00:12:19,907 Theodore, you know the Arcadian is a badly built, 250 00:12:19,973 --> 00:12:22,575 architecturally unimportant rat's nest, 251 00:12:22,642 --> 00:12:26,780 designed by an overpaid, plagiarizing ether addict with two thumbs. 252 00:12:26,847 --> 00:12:29,016 This guy. 253 00:12:29,082 --> 00:12:31,852 Okay, yes, it's a terrible building, 254 00:12:31,919 --> 00:12:34,754 but does that mean we have to knock it down? 255 00:12:34,822 --> 00:12:36,890 I mean, it's not bothering anyone-- 256 00:12:36,957 --> 00:12:39,126 just anyone who lives in it... 257 00:12:39,192 --> 00:12:42,695 or looks at it... or smells it. 258 00:12:42,762 --> 00:12:46,533 New York is never finished, Theodore. 259 00:12:46,599 --> 00:12:50,470 She's a lady only a handful of architects ever get to dance with. 260 00:12:51,538 --> 00:12:53,807 Do not miss your turn. 261 00:12:56,676 --> 00:12:58,745 The Arcadian has to go, doesn't it? 262 00:12:58,812 --> 00:13:00,080 Indeed. 263 00:13:00,147 --> 00:13:03,616 You realize this kind of screws up my personal life. 264 00:13:03,683 --> 00:13:05,953 Mo' buildings, mo' problems. 265 00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:11,224 This is a dream, right? 266 00:13:11,291 --> 00:13:13,793 Because, Barney, I swear to God, if that's you-- 267 00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:16,163 [ Snaps Fingers ] 268 00:13:17,965 --> 00:13:21,234 Mommy's got magic lady bits, Ted. 269 00:13:21,902 --> 00:13:23,136 Dream! Dream! 270 00:13:23,203 --> 00:13:27,507 [ Exhales ] It was just a dream. Oh! 271 00:13:29,509 --> 00:13:32,412 [ Panting ] 272 00:13:45,993 --> 00:13:50,530 Hey. I know it's late, but, uh, you wanna meet up? 273 00:13:51,531 --> 00:13:53,901 [ Zoey ] Hello, Mr. Lion. 274 00:13:53,967 --> 00:13:58,438 "Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!" 275 00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:01,574 Hey. I met you... 276 00:14:01,641 --> 00:14:03,276 right... 277 00:14:04,744 --> 00:14:06,313 [ Chuckling ] 278 00:14:06,379 --> 00:14:07,414 here. Right. 279 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:10,683 And I mistook you for a prostitute right... 280 00:14:10,750 --> 00:14:12,552 here. 281 00:14:12,619 --> 00:14:15,222 Far as you know, I still could be one. Oh. 282 00:14:15,288 --> 00:14:17,524 And you, my good man, have run up quite a tab. 283 00:14:22,930 --> 00:14:24,597 Worth every penny. 284 00:14:27,034 --> 00:14:29,536 All right. This was fun. 285 00:14:31,004 --> 00:14:34,274 [ Vehicle Approaching ] I'm gonna take this cab. 286 00:14:34,341 --> 00:14:37,911 Big day tomorrow. We need to get some sleep. 287 00:14:42,415 --> 00:14:44,884 And yet-- 288 00:14:45,986 --> 00:14:48,088 No, we should get some sleep. 289 00:14:48,155 --> 00:14:49,622 But this was fun. 290 00:14:49,689 --> 00:14:51,491 Yeah. 291 00:14:51,558 --> 00:14:54,962 It's nice getting one last look to remember what we're trying to save. 292 00:14:55,862 --> 00:14:58,131 Exactly. 293 00:14:59,266 --> 00:15:02,269 - You okay? - Yeah. Good night. 294 00:15:03,937 --> 00:15:07,007 [ Chairman ] Mr. Mosby, I'm going to ask you one last time. 295 00:15:07,074 --> 00:15:09,342 Should the Arcadian be a landmark? 296 00:15:11,744 --> 00:15:13,981 No. It shouldn't be a landmark. 297 00:15:14,047 --> 00:15:17,750 - [ Scattered Gasps, Murmurs ] - There are a lot of important buildings in New York. 298 00:15:17,817 --> 00:15:19,987 The Arcadian isn't one of them. 299 00:15:24,257 --> 00:15:26,960 Excuse me. I have a question for Mr. Mosby. 300 00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:29,562 If he doesn't think the Arcadian is worth saving, 301 00:15:29,629 --> 00:15:32,532 then whose voice is this? 302 00:15:32,599 --> 00:15:34,801 The Arcadian should be a landmark. 303 00:15:34,867 --> 00:15:36,303 It should. 304 00:15:36,369 --> 00:15:39,172 The lion head stonework is iconic. 305 00:15:40,340 --> 00:15:42,775 I hate working for GNB. They're a bunch of... 306 00:15:42,842 --> 00:15:44,844 wieners and gonads. 307 00:15:44,911 --> 00:15:46,846 - [ Murmuring ] - Oh, heavens. 308 00:15:46,913 --> 00:15:48,615 [ Southern Accent ] My stars! 309 00:15:48,681 --> 00:15:50,250 Is that your voice, Mr. Mosby? 310 00:15:54,988 --> 00:15:56,489 Yeah, that's me. 311 00:16:01,861 --> 00:16:05,432 This is a nightmare. I can't believe she kept that tape. 312 00:16:05,498 --> 00:16:07,967 The L.P.C.'s gonna come back with a decision tomorrow. 313 00:16:08,035 --> 00:16:11,138 - And based on today-- - They're gonna landmark the hell out of that place. 314 00:16:11,204 --> 00:16:13,540 Yeah. We'll end up out of a job, 315 00:16:13,606 --> 00:16:17,410 all thanks to some stupid, "only sort of awesome" lion head. 316 00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:19,812 Yeah. Better get used to that lion head. 317 00:16:19,879 --> 00:16:24,017 As of tomorrow, it's gonna be there till the end of times-- 318 00:16:24,084 --> 00:16:26,453 and all because of my sweet, sweet rhymes. 319 00:16:28,888 --> 00:16:30,990 What are we gonna do? 320 00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:36,063 - We should buy a bar. - We should totally buy a bar. 321 00:16:36,129 --> 00:16:37,697 We should absolutely, totally buy a bar. 322 00:16:37,764 --> 00:16:40,500 Really, the only sensible idea right now. [ Marshall ] Oh. And ready? 323 00:16:40,567 --> 00:16:43,036 - It's a theme bar. - [ Ted ] Mm. 324 00:16:43,103 --> 00:16:46,206 - It's a courtroom. - Yes! 325 00:16:46,273 --> 00:16:49,242 Where the bartenders wear sexy judges' robes. 326 00:16:49,309 --> 00:16:50,910 [ Barney ] Ooh! I'll allow it. 327 00:16:50,977 --> 00:16:53,213 It's the only court where you show up, then get served. 328 00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:54,281 Nice. [ Barney ] Ho! 329 00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:56,616 You're judged by a jury of your beers. 330 00:16:56,683 --> 00:16:59,519 - That's not bad. - Would you just stop it? No one's buying a bar. 331 00:16:59,586 --> 00:17:03,022 Right now we have a little problem. Let's just think of a solution. 332 00:17:03,090 --> 00:17:06,559 Lily, it's over. The good guys lost. 333 00:17:06,626 --> 00:17:10,163 I don't know. Homegirl is pretty diabolical. 334 00:17:10,230 --> 00:17:12,365 If there is a plan that'll get us out of this, 335 00:17:12,432 --> 00:17:15,802 it's somewhere inside this butter churn. 336 00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:17,504 She'll think of it. 337 00:17:17,570 --> 00:17:22,275 I'm just gonna sit here, watch it happen. 338 00:17:25,178 --> 00:17:28,181 And she's got it. Lily, what's the plan? 339 00:17:28,248 --> 00:17:30,617 Oh, this ought to be good. 340 00:17:30,683 --> 00:17:32,752 [ Ted Narrating ] And then Lily told us her plan. 341 00:17:33,653 --> 00:17:35,988 Oh, this is good. 342 00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:38,758 We have to find Arthur right now. Ohh! 343 00:17:40,360 --> 00:17:42,362 What is so difficult about this? 344 00:17:42,429 --> 00:17:44,664 Tugboat figured this out in, like, five minutes. 345 00:17:44,731 --> 00:17:47,033 This is bush league. 346 00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:49,202 Hey, Arthur. Oh, cute dog. 347 00:17:49,269 --> 00:17:52,105 No. Tugboat, my other dog-- that was a cute dog. 348 00:17:52,172 --> 00:17:56,576 This little disappointment is nothing but a cheap facsimile. I said it! 349 00:17:56,643 --> 00:17:58,778 Yeah, my love is reserved for dogs... 350 00:17:58,845 --> 00:18:02,182 that go to the bathroom on command instead of wasting my time! 351 00:18:03,683 --> 00:18:06,018 Listen. Arthur, Marshall's wife has an idea... 352 00:18:06,085 --> 00:18:08,788 for how we can save not saving the Arcadian. 353 00:18:08,855 --> 00:18:11,491 Oh, his wife has an idea? Let me tell you about wives, okay? 354 00:18:11,558 --> 00:18:14,227 They leave you and take your best friend with them. 355 00:18:14,294 --> 00:18:17,730 You're not Tugboat! You'll never be Tugboat! 356 00:18:19,132 --> 00:18:22,001 God. [ Sighs ] 357 00:18:22,068 --> 00:18:23,303 Hey, Arthur. 358 00:18:31,244 --> 00:18:34,514 I guess this one's kind of cute or whatever. 359 00:18:36,015 --> 00:18:38,485 So-So-- So, what's the idea? 360 00:18:38,551 --> 00:18:41,521 Okay, first hear my demands. 361 00:18:41,588 --> 00:18:44,291 One, Ted and Barney keep their jobs. 362 00:18:44,357 --> 00:18:48,861 Two, when you guys do finally blow up the Arcadian, one of them gets to push the button. 363 00:18:48,928 --> 00:18:50,797 [ Together ] Dibs. 364 00:18:50,863 --> 00:18:52,765 Fine. What's the idea? 365 00:18:52,832 --> 00:18:55,067 Well-- [ Ted Narrating ] Kids, for legal reasons, 366 00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:57,870 I have to skip this part of the story and jump ahead to the next night... 367 00:18:57,937 --> 00:19:01,208 as the Landmarks Preservation Commission gave their verdict. 368 00:19:01,274 --> 00:19:03,710 Last night, this committee took a vote. 369 00:19:03,776 --> 00:19:06,246 And while we have all felt from the very beginning... 370 00:19:06,313 --> 00:19:12,051 that the Arcadian is, well, an eyesore, 371 00:19:12,118 --> 00:19:16,823 Mr. Mosby's surprising testimony about the lion's head stonework... 372 00:19:16,889 --> 00:19:21,194 left us no choice but to declare it... a landmark. 373 00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:28,735 But then something else happened last night. 374 00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:31,938 That same lion's head stonework... 375 00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:34,874 [ Whirring ] 376 00:19:34,941 --> 00:19:35,908 disappeared. 377 00:19:35,975 --> 00:19:37,477 [ All Gasp ] 378 00:19:37,544 --> 00:19:41,248 So that makes our job a little easier. 379 00:19:41,314 --> 00:19:43,950 - Motion denied. - [ Audience Exclaiming ] 380 00:19:52,725 --> 00:19:54,661 Zoey. Zoey! 381 00:19:55,928 --> 00:19:58,665 All right. What do you have to say for yourself? 382 00:19:58,731 --> 00:20:00,099 [ Sighs ] 383 00:20:00,166 --> 00:20:01,668 I don't know. 384 00:20:01,734 --> 00:20:05,372 Sometimes things have to fall apart... 385 00:20:05,438 --> 00:20:08,207 to make way for better things. 386 00:20:17,850 --> 00:20:19,552 We're done here. 387 00:20:28,795 --> 00:20:30,797 Okay, you don't have to hold back anymore. 388 00:20:30,863 --> 00:20:33,300 You may now say what you really think of Zoey. 389 00:20:33,366 --> 00:20:35,535 I don't know. She may have been right about that lion's head. 390 00:20:35,602 --> 00:20:38,338 It gave the Arcadian a regal elegance. 391 00:20:38,405 --> 00:20:40,407 Then again, it goes really nice with my duvet. 392 00:20:43,175 --> 00:20:45,478 I hope I used the right screws.